“And now these three remain; faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”—1 Corinthians 13:13 (NIV)
2018 brought many challenges, both emotional and spiritual. I lost my husband of 31 years, my sweet fur baby of 12 years, and my mom of 54 years. I can only liken the year to the experience of being on a small boat tossed about by (sometimes) violent rolls of emotion that threatened to overtake me. A year of uncharted waters. I’ve questioned many things, and I’ve had to face the fact that my God has left me with unanswered prayers.
This year started off with another loss in the family, my husband’s sister. Her love for people and life remained even in her last few days. As the end drew near, her natural response was to lift her head and offer a smile of gratitude for those who had come to visit. We continued to pray asking God to move His hand and stop the progression of the cruel thief that slowly crept in. We prayed until her last breath.
I’ve been asked, “How can you believe in a God who does not answer prayers?” I immediately ask, “Why do you say that?” It’s not as if I don’t know what they’re feeling, because I’ve been there. But behind every question is a real person with a real need to understand. I want to respond in the right way, sharing why I still pray and remain expectant that God will answer my prayers.
If God answered all my prayers, I would question His wisdom and sovereignty. He’d be more of a genie in a bottle who is at our disposal vs someone who looks out for us with a wisdom that exceeds our understanding. Answering every prayer as asked would negate His ability to be the authority over all things on earth and heaven. I’ve heard Bill Johnson of Bethel Church say, “If we make God our servant, we will constantly be confused. But if we serve God we will constantly be amazed.”
We can’t hang our unanswered prayers on the only definition of God. Unanswered prayer, science, Christianity, history, etc., will only give us tiny glimpses into who God is or is not. Looking at Him through a single lens will only reveal a small portion causing us to miss the bigger picture. The breadth, width, height, and depth of God will never be defined through a single lens.
Who really wants a “gimme” god? We don’t respect people we can control and overrun, so how much less would we respect someone who is simply an order taker? If we received everything we asked for, we would not feel the need to draw close to Him to learn the things of His heart. We would miss out on what He wants to reveal to us about Himself and about ourselves through His eyes. We understand who we are by discovering who He is. After all, we were made in His image.
The God of the Holy Bible is the God of relationship. Of all that He has created, we alone are given the position of daughter. When it comes to titles in families, the core titles (mom, dad, daughter, son) are the most intimate of all relationships. We’re tethered to His heart and, when we draw close, He’s quick to reveal the type of Father He is. He catches our tears, guards our hearts, shares His wisdom, and covers our shortcomings. In addition to all the capacities through which He reveals Himself, there is another thing that sets Him apart from any other god … He’s always present. He’s the living, breathing, moving God who is engaged with who we are, where we’re going, and how we get there.
I heard Pastor Tony Evans speak just hours after losing his niece. She was young, beautiful, and had a husband and young children. This precious family had just stepped into a journey of questions and pain. My heart broke knowing she would never get to participate in the major milestones mothers and daughters share. Her family would not get to see her embrace the future generations she had played a major part in. I wept for them. But Pastor Evans brought comfort to my tears when he shared a truth of who God is. I don’t recall his words verbatim, but my takeaway was that because he had already experienced God as loving, kind, generous, and merciful, he could not discredit those truths based on his current level of pain.
I’ll never stop praying because, ultimately, prayer is not about what I can get. Prayer is about growing in relationship with the One and Only.
NOW LIVE LOVED and THRIVE!
Self-reflection
These questions are in no way a substitute for healthcare professionals or any level of professional counseling. I’m an advocate for taking care of oneself mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. These questions reflect my heart, NOT my profession.
This questionnaire is an opportunity to journal your thoughts and feelings. It can serve as a launching pad on which to evaluate your heart condition as you understand it. My hope is that you will take the truths you discover about yourself and hold them up to the Light to evaluate them against who God says you are.
- Do you think God would be mad at you if you questioned Him?
- What scripture backs up your answer to the above question?
- Have you ever questioned God?
- If so, did you ask Him directly or did you try to hide your disappointment by holding your anger inside?
- What was your conclusion/result?
- Do you think it’s possible to lose hope but keep your faith? Explain.
- What do you think the most powerful aspect of love is? Define it in your own words and then find a scripture on love and write how God reveals love.
Use God’s word to take control over traumas in your life. Whenever you feel terrorized by your thoughts, take them captive by replacing them with the truth of God’s promises found in His word.
Print, then cut and carry this Scripture with you and/or post it in places where you will see it often. Ground yourself in God’s truths not Satan’s attacks. Encourage your heart and mind every time you are reminded of His great love for YOU!
Here is what God’s word says to encourage you and to give you an example of His unfailing, relentless, unending love for you:
“And now these three remain; faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”—1 Corinthians 13:13 (NIV)
Say to yourself: God singles out faith, hope, and love as three of the most powerful choices we can make. He goes even further and reveals where His power is rooted by saying love is the secret ingredient to life!
Now LIVE LOVED and THRIVE!
